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Lightning Strike
Takes Out AU Fan

By Gilbert Lowell
gibby@piedmontgazette.com

Rabid Auburn fan and Piedmont resident, Willie Cartwright was electrocuted when lightning hit one of the oak trees that stand on Toomer's Corner. Family members of Mr. Cartwright claim he was convinced he could rid the tree of the disease which is slowly killing it with his "magical semen."
 
"Since Willie was 13, he has believed his sperm held mystical powers" said family member Milton Hooks. "He has told me several times that he has raised animals from the dead with his sperm. He even tried to sell it at the flea market as a cure-all but it didn’t pan out."
 
According to family friend, Thelma Hay, Mr. Cartwright was convinced he was the reason for Auburn's current five-game game winning streak over Alabama. "For the last five years, he has thrown his sperm on the Auburn football players during the Tiger Walk, or as they exited the bus in Tuscaloosa. He was a special, special man and I am going to miss him".
 
The accident happened late Sunday night during the thunder storm that moved through Auburn. "I saw a half naked man that looked to be pleasuring himself on the tree. He was yelling 'I can save you! I can save you!' when - Boom! Crack! - the lightning struck and then all I didn’t hear anything," recalls Mike Randall, an Auburn student who witnessed the tragedy.
 
"I was out taking pictures of the storm. I guess I was 30 yards away and I could see everything. The lightning ran down the side of the oak right into the top of his head. The tree was scorched and smoking and he was just gone. He looked like a pile of charcoal."
 
Police have confirmed that Mr. Cartwright, 28, "was instantly electrocuted by a bolt of lightning".
 
A spokesman for the Auburn issued a statement saying that they were "extremely saddened by the incident, and urge all of the Auburn family to practice safety during a thunder storm".

Gilbert Lowell covers the state of Alabama for The Piedmont Gazette.

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Hidden camera shows subjects identified as “Iglass” and “TideDog” fighting in what local authorities call an organized fight ring known only as “Chimes-Noon”

Rash of ‘Chimes-Noon’ Fights
Concern Tuscaloosa Authorities

TUSCALOOSA, ALA. (AP) — Authorities in Tuscaloosa are trying to bust what they describe as an internet "chit-chat room" fight club that is drawing crowds to brutal bouts which allegedly include gambling, a championship bracket and videotaping, with DVDs of the action going for $5 on the sites Video Exchange board.

One participant, who asked to remain anonymous for this piece, said the fight club is real, but she contends authorities are blowing it out of proportion. "My dog goes with me. There is no danger other than a good ass whippin'. I just hope they start a women’s bracket because there is this one whore that stole my Zone ticket and I want to beat her ass" she said.

Tuscaloosa police chief, Ken Swindle, couldn't believe the beatings he watched in videos his officers confiscated during a large steroid bust late last week in Northport.

"This one guy was about 200 pounds bigger than the other one, and he had him down by the neck and was just hitting him over and over," said Swindle. "It was brutal. It was appalling and the people watching this beating were sitting back chanting 'BBA!BBA!BBA!' In another beating there was a man who resembled an overweight Richie Cunnigham and he was beating on a man who looked a lot like Mr. Six from the Six Flags commercials with a camera. In that fight the crowd was chanting the word 'Iglass' over and over. We're not even sure what an 'Iglass' is, but the beating was horrible."

Authorities aren't aware of any serious injuries, and they haven't made any arrests.

Videos of men fighting aren't anything new — they're all over YouTube. What troubles authorities about the Tuscaloosa County fight club is the apparent level of organization, which resembles a business as much as anything.

"We think, maybe, there is one central person running this club. In a few of the videos, some of the participants refer to someone whom they call 'Dalton' or 'The Man'" Swindle said.

Organizers are using cell phones and mass-blast text messaging to quickly draw crowds, which disperse as fast as they appear, police say. They are not aware if admission is charged.

Investigators said they haven't had much success in getting anyone to break a code of silence that surrounds the fights, but they believe the matchups are more than just random pairings. "We think it has something to do with chat room arguments over football coaches, politics and possbily religion" said Swindle.

"They are calling it 'Chimes-Noon'. Supposedly they have a bracket. I was told they're working their way to a championship belt and a free membership to the web site where all of this originated. We think we have a good idea which web site is the source of all this, but we are not prepared to release that information at this time."

Swindle said the fights look to be inspired by TV shows including Ultimate Fighting Championship, which features bouts with punching, kicking and wrestling.